Feeling kinda human

9 Jun

willis.jpgIf you asked anyone who knows me to sum up my personality, they’d probably begin by detailing my abhor for emotions. Cold-hearted. Callous. Rational to a fault. Devoid of feelings and really damn proud of it.

This mostly comes through in my conversations about sports. I wave off such girly notions as superstition and chemistry. I laugh in the face of people who point to these “factors” as indicators of success. (I should also mention that I’m an asshole. My friends would mention this, too.)

And yet…there are times when this iron-clad facade cracks just a little. It’s rare, but it happens.

Tonight was one of those nights. I flipped on ESPN to witness Dontrelle Willis, revered as one of baseball’s “good guys” and trying to regain his former dominance, had what has to be the worst performance of his career. 1-1/3 innings pitched, 8 runs, 5 walks. Of his 64 pitches, 37 were balls. 37 balls to get 4 outs. Most weren’t even close. It was a positively Ankielesque performance, and watching this dude stand up on the mound and fire ball after ball, his humiliated emotions showing on his face, and hearing the restless crowd start booing him, and having Leyland finally come out to mercifully remove him from the game, I honestly thought Dontrelle was going to cry. And holy fuck, did I feel sorry for him.

Look. I know how lame this is. I know exactly how lame; I routinely tease idiots like me who admit to having these “human feelings” or whatever you call them. It’s not business, it’s personal. Add the fact that I don’t even like the Tigers or know much about Dontrelle at all, and the conclusion is painfully clear: I’m going soft.


This is a temporary problem, I assure you. I’ll get right, and soon.

4 Responses to “Feeling kinda human”

  1. The Murph June 10, 2008 at 7:05 am #

    I think your emotional response is nothing more than pitcher empathy…

    I remember this one time I was watching this guy at work struggling with a VLOOKUP…He had forgotten to concatenate his numbers so they would be recognized as text…Not to mention when he converted his text-to-columns the poor sap formatted it with a fixed width when he should have delimited…Really tore me up inside.

  2. B. June 10, 2008 at 8:45 am #

    Wow, Murph. Just…wow. I was having a decent day, and then I read that tearjerker of a story…and now I’m sitting here crying my eyes out. I can’t believe that poor guy utilized a fixed width…must have been his upbringing. I [sniff] feel so bad for people like that.

  3. BreAnne June 10, 2008 at 11:11 am #

    Wow, that almost made ME cry, and I guarantee I’m a bigger asshole than you.

  4. norm June 10, 2008 at 1:36 pm #

    Looks like you had a rough night friend, but be respectful and return my girlfriend’s copy of the Notebook and replace my carton of Cherry Garcia.

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