I shall call it a "mini-Cooler"

17 Nov

suchanidiot.jpgTime for another round-up of web links to help pass the time. I can guarantee you these stories are going to blow your mind … or at least waste your time. Happy Friday, reader(s).

The man behind Borat and his award-winning mustache Sacha Baron Cohen sat down for a rare out-of-character interview with Rolling Stone. Reasonably interesting. (No word whether he shook hands with the interviewer using his Jew-claw or not.)

***

Further proof that God has no direct interest in making the world a better place: former American Idol contestant/date rapist Constantine Maroulis is still somewhat famous. Logic would tell you that the chinless Travolta wannabe would’ve faded off into the sunset with Anthony Fedorov and Scott Savol…but no. He just keeps khanging around and khanging around.

Surprisingly enough, he’s an even bigger douchebag than you think. No, really. You could check out the entire damning interview yourself, or just read a few of his choice quotes below and go on back trying to forget him. Ball’s in your court on this one.

– “[My fans] are loyal, patient and predominantly female. They range from teenagers to grandmothers and everything in between. They are housewives, with kids in school, feeling like they got their groove back.”

– “I want to be able to dictate what happens to “Constantine” and build it into more of a household name than it already is.”

– “I think people gravitate towards me because I can communicate with them. I know people. I grew up in New York and New Jersey and I have a street sense about me.”

– “People know that I’m for real. More and more people are starting to realize that. I’m about the work. I have the chops, and I have a great fan base. Give me a chance, and I’ll do the job.”

– “These rooms want me there because they know that my band kills and that the show is going to kill.”

– “I have songs that could choke an elephant, and I’m just waiting for the right time to get them out, and to do the projects that I want to do.”

***

Hey, I made up a hilarious joke the other day. It goes a little sumpthin’ like this:

Q: How do you know your president is evil?

A: When he says “the Democrat approach in Iraq comes down to this: The terrorists win and America loses” … and no one even bats an eye.

Now that is one for the ages. Guaranteed to make at least half your audience break down in tears and curl up in the fetal position. Because it’s so funny, see.

***

No matter how big of a geek you are, I can assure you, there is no way you are the biggest geek in the world. The following video will prove that beyond a shadow of a doubt. Man, white people crack me up.

Today’s challenge is to make it further into the video than I did. My score: 1:26. Your mission is clear.

Advertisements

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s

%d bloggers like this: