The Riff, ep 31: “The No Fudge Club”

This week’s episode of The Riff finds the bros discussing JoePa, a horny pastor, cover letters, booze, the No Cussing Club, a rousing game of Name That Drug, cancer cures and the requisite 20 minute Wolves chat. ‘Twas a good talk, have yourself a listen.

iTunes here | mp3 here

The Riff, ep 30: “Violent mating battles”

Discussed in this week’s Riff: bungee jumping, a crazy Valentine’s Day event, hangover cures, Greece’s pedophilia sympathy, cruise ship disasters, bros, turds, Tebow and your weekly dose of Wolves talk. Another fun one. Give it a listen and spread the gospel, friends.

Direct download here, or you can find us on iTunes.

The Riff, ep 29: “Bros and turds”

Tony, Ryan and I talk David O. Russell, Facebook pranks, a Papa John’s racism kerfuffle, some random nonsense and a whole lot of Wolves: specifically the last three games, potential trades, how to improve the team, an argument over DWill, free agent prospects and, yeah, more drooling over Rubio. Fun one. Have a listen.

iTunes here | non-iTunes here or below:

Dave Holmes nails it yet again

As always, Holmes is the absolute best.

If Michele and Marcus Bachmann did not exist, and you were to write them and their adventures as fiction- as a spec pilot, say, or a series of sketches in your weekly ”How ‘Bout Those Headlines” show at WackyTeamz or whatever- the one note you would consistently get would be: “Lose the doggy sunglasses bit. It’s a little on the nose, don’t you think?” Your mother would tell you this. “Dude’s closeted. Message received. A real person would never behave this way. Dial it back.”

But they are real, and they did behave this way- live, in front of millions of people- and it made Ben and me laugh so hard we frightened our own dog.

God bless America.

My favorite songs of 2011

I’m sure I missed a ton of great music, but here goes:

1. “June Hymn” – The Decemberists

2. “Sorry 4 the Wait” – Lil Wayne

3. “Black” – Danger Mouse & Daniele Luppi

4. “Rise to Me” – The Decemberists

5. “Go” – Santigold Feat. Karen O

6. “Lonely Boy” – Black Keys

7. “Bedroom Eyes” – Dum Dum Girls

8. “Lost in my Mind” – The Head and the Heart (technically 2010, sorry)

9. ”Everything You See (Kids Say Hallelujah)” – Portugal. The Man

10. “Stop Stop” – Black Keys

11. “All Your Light (Times Like These)” – Portugal. The Man

12. “Gold on the Ceiling” – Black Keys

13. “Scale it Back” – DJ Shadow

14. “Cruel” – St. Vincent

15. “Holocene” – Bon Iver

16. “So American” – Portugal. The Man

Either I missed a lot of great songs or 2011 wasn’t a great year for music. 2010 was much better.

The Riff, ep 28: “Fun With Small Sample Sizes”

Your prayers have been answered: it’s another NBA-centric installment of The Riff. Brandon and Tony talk power polls, sucker bets, crybabies, player grades, potential Wolves trades, “Name that Drug” and of course, about an hour straight of drooling over Rubio. Press play and allow our velvety tenors to envelop your soul. Or something.

iTunes here | Non-iTunes here or below:

Recommended: “Who Won 2011?” on Grantland

The bracket-style 2011 wrap-up was an outstanding read, in particular this breakdown of the matchup between Siri and Ryan Gosling:

How did he do it? No one knows. While Siri is filled with attitude toward common folk like you and me, if Ryan asked her “Where can I find a roll of triple-ply toilet tissue? This lamb vindaloo is not sitting right,” she would probably faint and respond with “RYAN OMG JUST TAKE ME WITH YOU.” For the ability to arouse a robot, Gosling takes the easy win.

Much more goodness in the same vein. Go now.

Free music alert

Tons of great free tunes here and here. Sample away, my friends.

The Riff, ep 27: “The chaotic Wolves preview podcast”

Are you in the mood for a rambling, tangent-heavy, jokey, overly loud Wolves season preview podcast? Then I’ve got just the thing. Listen in as as a small army of guest co-hosts and I discuss the NBA, Sam Hurd, the Rosemount prank, music and a whole lot of Wolves. This one’s pretty hectic but was a lot of fun. Dig it.

iTunes here | non-iTunes here or below.

Dave Holmes on the supposed War on Christmas

This post by the great Dave Holmes – one of my closest pretend internet friends — killed me last year. It’s worth re-posting in full (with Dave’s pretend permission, of course):

O What Fun It Is To Shut Up About Whether Or Not You’re Allowed To Say “Merry Christmas.”

Because you should remember two very important things:

1) You are, and

2) No, really: you are.

There is no such thing as the War On Christmas. Yes, there are a few incidents in which people are arguing about whether nativity scenes or explicitly Christmas-related displays have any place on public property, which is

1) an argument worth having, and

2) up to those individual communities to work out for themselves.

People have been saying “Happy Holidays” and “Season’s Greetings” as long as I’ve been alive, and I didn’t learn until recently that I was supposed to be a huge, ungracious dick about it. In my childhood, I thought it meant “Merry Christmas AND Happy New Year,” and now that I’m a grown-up and I have friends of all different cultural and religious backgrounds, I realize it’s just a nice thing to say. Happy Whatever You Celebrate. I say “Merry Christmas” a lot too, because that’s my cultural and religious background, and I haven’t run into trouble yet. Neither have you.

The War On Christmas, like Santa Claus, is something people made up to compel you to buy things or watch TV shows.

Also, the X in Xmas is not an English-alphabet X, but a Greek Chi, Chi standing for “Christ.” Nobody is X-ing out Jesus.

I know you all know this, but I just read way too many posts about it today. (Way too many is 2.) Also, I’m steeling myself for my trip home, where last year one of my brothers came over for Christmas-present-opening with his family, opened the door and said: “Merry Christmas! I’m still allowed to say that, right?” Ugh. Yes. Yes, you are still allowed to say that. You will always be allowed to say that. Stick a nog in it.